"Garth, marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries!" once exclaimed a mulleted Wayne Campbell to an underbite-plagued Garth Algar in everyone's (ok, maybe just my) favorite SNL spinoff, Wayne's World.
While Wayne openly expressed his fears of having to settle down permanently, which wouldn't have been so bad with bass playing babe Cassandra, he probably struck a chord with lots of 20- and 30-somethings who've avoided marriage for the same reasons.
Ironically, though, and without even knowing it, Wayne Campbell brought Kevin and I closer together in our marriage. We've probably watched annoyingly recited every line within that movie as we watched it 20 times in our nearly 8 years together. And today, as we celebrate four whole years of being hitched, I can only hope that we'll continue to spout off lines from 90's flicks and do other fun stuff, too. (You know, like having more babies, fetching an extra roll of TP for the other, watching each other's hair turn gray, arguing over whether it's better to get ice cream before or after running errands.)
Actual anniversary card circa yesterday evening.
Since the "Wayne's World" sketches always featured Top 10 lists, it's only appropriate that I give you a Top 10 list to celebrate this fourth anniversary.
The Top Ten Reasons We've Been Married Four-ever
10) We're comfortable with each other's gross habits. Pooping, farting, boogers, you name it. I can't imagine being married to someone who judged me while I pick my nose. Well, at least someone who openly judged me. Kevin just quietly side-eyes me and asks me to wash my hands after.
9) We talk about money. Often. Once a week maybe? Even though I carried a ton of debt (and still do - pesky student loans) when he first met me, Kevin worked with me to slowly pay things off, and now we live a pretty good life debt-wise. We don't spend freely, but we're not complete tightwads, either. If there's a big purchase to be made, then there's a big discussion to be had.
8) We balance each other's personalities. Some days, I'm a raging, Type-A bitch. Some days, Kevin's running late. He makes sure I eventually calm down, and I make sure he eventually gets to where he needs to go.
7) We love a good snack. Most of our "date nights" revolve around watching a movie we've already seen, a box of Milk Duds, a bag of gummy worms, some Mike & Ikes, Coke Zero, the couch, kettle-style chips, and ice cream.
6) We bond over bad puns. Kevin's sense of humor is akin to that of an 86 year old. Since I always appreciate a good bad pun, it works out. His favorite? A road near our old apartment was called Heslip. Every time we'd drive by, Kevin would ask me, "How did the guy hurt himself?" Ha. Get it?
5) We fight. Rare is the couple who doesn't ever argue. Fighting's good for the soul, and I'm always up for a good debate. What do we fight about? Politics. Which is the fastest way to get to the mall. Whether pro sports players are actually worth their pay.
4) We love shopping together. Kevin's way more up on cool trends than I am, so it works out when I want to try on 42 pairs of pants at J. Crew while he searches for a wool nautical tie.
3) We have a pretty cute kid that keeps us both on our toes. He's a good dad.
2) We think that going to a "nice" dinner is getting the 2 for $20 special at Chili's. Splitting the chicken crispers is the best part.
1) We don't take life too seriously, most of the time. I owe this number one reason more to Kevin more than myself. He's real good at keeping things afloat, making me laugh, and reminding us to always have a good time, no matter what happens.